


Golden Throat

by gardnerhill



Series: 221b Ficlets by Gardnerhill [31]
Category: Elementary (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: 221B Ficlet, Community: watsons_woes, Gen, Karaoke, Prompt Fic, Watson's Woes July Writing Prompts 2015
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-29
Updated: 2015-07-29
Packaged: 2018-04-11 20:40:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4451603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gardnerhill/pseuds/gardnerhill
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Amazingly, there actually is something that Joan Watson is BAD at.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Golden Throat

**Author's Note:**

> For the 2015 July Watson's Woes Promptfest prompt #28, _**Bad, Bad, oh so Bad!**_ _Whether it's bad art, bad fiction, or just plain awful, let the badness inspire you in some way today. Take a bad song and make it better, or make it so bad it's good? It's up to you!_

“I see our quarry. Keep everyone distracted, Watson,” Sherlock hissed in Joan’s ear, leaving his seat even as she got up. “I’ll be back as soon as possible. But for now, keep everyone’s attention on you.” He vanished into the shadows even as she stepped into the spotlight.  
  
That last order from her partner would have been a hell of a lot more comforting in, say, a strip club or a punk poetry slam. Joan figured she could strip about as well as could anyone who needed to undress, namely everyone – and if you rattled off enough profanity and bodily-function words to something resembling a rhythm you had modern poetry nailed.  
  
But this. Oh, God, this.  
  
“ _Feelings. Nothing more than feeeelings…_ ”  
  
Joan Watson, who could make her voice carry across an operating room or a crime scene with all the authority anyone could need, couldn’t carry a tune in a paper bag. Were you to graph the phenomenon, the song’s melody would be seen curving along in a smooth arc, dipping and rising – while Joan’s voice zig-zagged up and down like a bad day on Wall Street in the general vicinity of each note, trying vainly to land.  
  
She settled on mainly speaking the words and letting the machine fill in the music – and the machine was loud enough to blithely drown her out most of the time. Half the bar began yelling “Speak up!” and the other half began hollering “Shut up, you suck!”  
  
Vowing never to forgive Sherlock for this, Joan slipped a couple of bills to the guy working the karaoke machine. And stayed.  
  
_“Did you ever know that you’re my heee-roooooowww…”_  
  
“Get! Off! The Stage!” Stomp stomp. “Get! Off! The Stage!” Stomp stomp.  
  
_“Hey Jude. Don’t make it bad…”_  
  
That third one, at least, was pure genius. She got the whole crowd to join in at the end – that glorious never-ending ending. “ _Na, na na nanana naaaaa! Nanana naaaa! Hey Juuude!_ ” And finally the sound of actual, good singing filled the bar for the 3 solid minutes that ending lasted. (Okay, some of the hecklers were singing “ _Nanana naaaa! Fuck yoooooouuuu_!”) That ending pacified and mollified the crowd. It would have been the perfect way to bow out.  
  
Except that Sherlock wasn’t done with whatever he was doing in the back room – possibly a full interrogation of the suspect, or he was tied up in the back room, or he’d decided to pay a visit to the men’s room while he was there.  
  
So Joan smiled at the glaring, shouting crowd. “And now,” _I go home, change the locks and short-sheet that damn Englishman’s bed_ , “here’s ‘Wonderwall’.”  
  
“Booooooo!”

**Author's Note:**

> This is a double 221b - two 221-word parts, and both the 221st and 442nd words begin with "b."


End file.
